:: Youth is wasted on the young::

I adopted parenthood for a day when I attended my sister's primary school graduation on behalf on our parents last Friday. Next to the rest of the parent-guests, I looked stupidly young - I wasn't half as sophisticated, in both dress and manner; my face was frank and unlined, and I had a smile that was kissed with the beign radiance of youth.

And oh, how I smiled. My sister - the 12-year-old: I actually still remember picking her up from the hospital cot for the first time. How she had the fantastic baby-girl smell, of soap and powder, and of the incredible newness of life. Now she's almost a teenager, and I was there to see her graduate, literally, from one milestone to the beginning of the next.

I lived vicariously through her for a moment; I teared as though the ceremony was mine. I felt for the moment the loss of familiarity, the feeling of suddenly being a 'grown up', and I remember with wistful fondness the fragmented happiness I had as a child. I blocked out my father's anger and remembered my own innocence. For a moment I was happier than any of the children; I had my memories but I also had my new-adult wisdom that added a tinge of perspective to plain, illogical joy.

Afterwards I took her for her Day of the Firsts: her first sushi experience at a nice Japanese restaurant. Her first Starbucks coffee. Her first adult haircut with an impossibly goodlooking stylist. "You're the best sister in the world, and you're also a Super Woman, and I want to be just like you," she told me at the end of the day. Our eyes shone together - hers with joy, mine with regret - oh why oh why did I never do this until now. Such a simple thing to do - just being there. Just talking. Just being there for her as a friend, not The Elder Sister.

But yes, better late than never. It wasn't just her who graduated - I did too - to a new realm of responsibility where my parents can take care of her physical and functional wellbeing, but I can nurture her personality and help her realize her best potential - as a daughter, as a student, as a dancer, as a woman.

I just hope I can undertake this task with enthusiasm, if not always with success; with the best intentions, if not always with wisdom.

***

Saturday was special.
We saw Vienna in Spring.